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scatterjoy ([personal profile] scatterjoy) wrote2011-01-22 10:53 am
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LJ Idol: Week Ten - Icarus

Watching her fly used to be such an innocent thing. I remember when she would gleefully follow me into some mischief or another. We’d gang up on our younger brother in the pool, or watch MTV in the summer, dancing around in the living room or making weird choreography to go with the music. She would laugh and smile and dance with her arms outstretched, but there was always that smoldering underneath the happiness.

“Feisty” my grandfather used to call her. “Trouble,” would come the knowing response from my grandmother. She and I lost our common ground as teenagers, when she started hanging with people I had no interest in. There were the rare moments of sisterhood, then we would spin apart. I was content to fly just above the ground. She wanted to fly high enough to get away from it all.

Now, years later, it’s hard to watch her. A marriage broken, two kids clinging at her legs, living at home again with our mother. She is tethered, back against a wall, and the anger is rising up.

She says she isn’t an alcoholic. She gets angry when you try to talk to her. She puts on a show for the world to see, but under Jack’s blanket, she is angry, abusive, alone. Alone. She feels so alone, that the world has done nothing but shit on her. Her life has fallen apart while everyone else is happy and fulfilled and has everything they ever wanted. So she sits in her bedroom, trying to find the heights one more time in the bottom of a bottle.

Her wings are tattered, the wax that holds them together melting drop by drop into the abyss below. She is falling and she doesn’t even know it.

*****Voting is now open for this week's round - if you liked my entry, please vote for me. I'm in tribe two!*****

[identity profile] 2011-01-22 07:06 pm (UTC)(link)

What a gutpunch.

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 01:08 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you.

[identity profile] 2011-01-22 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
As [ profile] alephz said-- total gutpunch. I love how you constructed this, it's not too thick to get through, but not diluted enough to miss the emotion and tragedy.

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 01:09 am (UTC)(link)
My writing has been focused lately on trying to convey the story through shorter pieces, so I'm glad this worked for you. Thank you!

[identity profile] 2011-01-24 01:08 am (UTC)(link)

I couldn't have said it better.

[identity profile] 2011-01-22 11:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Wrenching. A devastating story. Well done.

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 01:09 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you.

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 12:44 am (UTC)(link)
So sad :(

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 01:09 am (UTC)(link)
It really is. Thank you.

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
Powerful. Well done.

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 03:45 am (UTC)(link)
wow, simply amazing.

[identity profile] 2011-01-23 08:35 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, very sad- to be the family member and feel so powerless to help. I hope she sees the light and asks for help!
Nice job.

[identity profile] 2011-01-24 04:19 am (UTC)(link)
Very sad :*(

[identity profile] 2011-01-24 06:02 am (UTC)(link)
oh :-( this is so sad

[identity profile] 2011-01-24 09:30 pm (UTC)(link)
So sad. This really put me in touch with my sometimes mixed feelings about my sisters. Caught this reader in the sweet section. ;-}

[identity profile] 2011-01-24 09:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Great story...(and proof that it doesn't need to be long to be eloquent)

[identity profile] 2011-01-25 03:05 am (UTC)(link)
Very evocative stuff!

[identity profile] 2011-01-25 09:28 pm (UTC)(link)
So sad. We all have a little bit of metaphoric Icarus in us, but your unfortunate character here has a good bit more. Nicely done!